


Deserving

by DarknessCares



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angels, Bunkers, Child Abuse, Complicated Relationships, Confused Dean Winchester, Courtship, Demons, F/M, Family Issues, Family Secrets, Forced, Gender or Sex Swap, Hunters & Hunting, M/M, Mates, Monsters, Mother is actually brother, Mother-Son Relationship, Not Beta Read, Nothing is normal, Other, Parent-Child Relationship, Protective Castiel (Supernatural), Protective Dean Winchester, Protective Siblings, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Revenge, Supernatural - Freeform, The Author Regrets Nothing, Werewolves, Witch Curses, Witches, searching for a beta
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-05
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2020-04-08 02:46:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19098187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarknessCares/pseuds/DarknessCares
Summary: John Winchester's grief took the control and trying to figure out what happened to his wife. He didn't want to worry about the boys, he needed something...while oblivious to the world of supernatural and unanswered situation, he did something that changed Dean's life completely. Dean did not ask for this as he's a child, but he was forced to take on the responsibility shoved at him. Life has not been the same for Dean and trying to process everything that happened. The baby Sam is depending on Dean to keep him alive while their father disappeared as he's obsession to Mary Winchester's death. Dean didn't know how he could do it. Something changed everything against Dean's safety and the fear she lives in.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Forgive me, I am still looking for a beta to work with. So, the grammar structure or flow may be off. I am welcome to constructive criticism to fix my mistakes.

A few days ago, John had lost a home and a wife and mother. John Winchester has not been the same since she was killed. He learned there were more to the truth of cruelty in the world and not sure what it was. The way it changed everything he knew as something did not make sense. He saw the boys are alive, which was good, but he didn't know how to do it. He became lost in what to do.  

 

In the back of his mind, he was playing the scene he rushed into the room and saw his wife. On the ceiling and burned away to death, it was surreal kind of thinking. How everything was too hot and the sweats down on him. The terror on her face was clear as day and felt helpless. The way her eyes gestured over to the crib and his mind couldn’t comprehend why she could not speak. His eyes drew over and saw the baby still there. 

 

It shook his core and desperately hoped to be a dream. He needed to feel something normal. Yet, he couldn’t shake it away. He stared down at the boys in front of him. Something that made him click in his mind. He couldn’t help it, but he needed something to make sense. Something to click back to reality again. Yet, the boys couldn’t be left alone. 

 

It took time to find someone and found the sitter that wouldn’t mind few twentys at the last minute. John left them with a sitter for a couple hours. He was gone for a couple of hours to deal with something. 

He eventually returned and took the boys with them somewhere far from home. Dean and Sam slept in the back of the Impala car. Something made John unable to click into the reality he knew and wasn’t taking the time to think much. The memory flashed back to see his wife in the fire and died. Nothing had made sense to him. The yearning for answers, but he couldn’t get up and leave the boys alone. He couldn’t do that to add in more guilt and grief alone himself. 

 

The drive was long, John managed to arrive to a place late at night and no one was around in the streets. He woke Dean up, picked up the baby, and headed into the building. Dean followed his dad like a little soldier he is and trying to be a big brother.

 

The woman saw them coming in and confused by this man with the children. John greeted her. 

 

“Hello, we spoke on the phone about age and gender changing.”

She recalled and nodded, “You do realize it can come with a price and I'm not talking about money.” Noticed that he wasn’t in a good state of condition.

John nodded, “I'll deal with that when that happened.” He pushed Dean up to the woman, “Make him 20 years older and a woman. I'll pay for your service. The spell can be only undone when the revenge for my wife is successful.”

 

The woman is a witch and she saw why he's making this child older, but gender change? She wasn't sure what that might important. Dean wasn't fully awake from his nap. She needed the money, so she agreed to his deal. She has no idea what happened, but there was no way to change the man’s mind, not even with the consequences to include. There was no telling what could become of them. 

 

John left with Sam to provide the space for the witch to do the job. Dean looked up at her curiously and yawns. The witch began her work and produced the spell. Dean's body slowly ages older, becoming 24 years old. He didn't understand what was going on and felt scared. The spell transformed him into adult with knowledge of a college student. 

 

The witch took on the next step of the job and transformed Dean's biological sex to the opposite. His body reformed and shifted to what the spell demanded into a woman. Dean didn't know what to think, but understood that he's older and a woman. Which, meant she's no longer a child or a boy. 

 

“Come in, mister Winchester. It is completed and she is set.” The witch called out.

 

John came out and saw her. He could see similar feature of his wife, but also him in Dean. He handed the money to witch and took Dean out. 

 

Dean is trying to understand what's going on and realize her father did something unusual. She's afraid to say something and waited until he said something. The car completely silent and intense the rest of the night. 

 

They arrive to a motel and headed into the room. John turned to Dean and handed Sam to her. Dean held her brother and look at John with confusion. 

 

“You are Sam's mother and will care for him. I will not have him grow up without a mother. Got that?”

 

Dean stammered, but understood what get father said. She nods and saw John leaving her with Sam to do something tonight. Sam is crying and Dean look down at him. She cradled him and shush him. 

 

“It's okay, Sammy. I'm here... I'm... Mommy is here.” Dean didn't want to upset their father and decided to do it, “What's wrong?” 

 

Dean’s memory flashes back to where Mary would hold Sam in her arms while breastfeeding. Dean sat down and pulled off a shirt and offered a breast to Sam. Sam on instinct starts to feed from her breast. She held him close and admired as he fed. 

 

Now she understood why their mother loved doing this. She watched Sam feeds from her and fell asleep slowly. She set him down on the bed and made a blockage to prevent him rolling off the bed. She kept him in her sight and went to the bathroom with door open. She looked into the mirror and saw she's completely different. She gulped, but understood why she was changed. The reason that her father had to do it, knowing that their mother was dead. 

 

Dean knew there was no way to argue with John and that he would revenge for his wife. She didn't know what happened that night, but it's clear it was done intentionally. Dean fixed her clothes and went back to Sam. She got on the bed and slept next to him. She's tired, but she's happy Sam is okay. 

 

…………….

 

John didn't come back to the motel until early morning three days later. Dean spent the entire time learning to be a mother and caring for Sam. It was a lot of work to keep up for her to do and she was putting in all the efforts to care for the little one. She was sitting on the bed with him on her lap and holding his small hands. Sam was being such a good baby and he's giggling at her. 

 

John entered in and saw the interaction. He was content that Dean doing her job naturally. He watched them interact as it recalled the way Mary did with both boys to keep them happy. He used to watch her do all of that and now, it was Dean’s job to do it. He carried in a large bag of clothes and set it on the table. 

 

“Sam been doing good?”

Dean nods, “He's a good boy with me. He loves feeding time with me.”

“Breastfeeding?”

 

Dean nods and John was impressed with her. He didn’t expect her to be quick to adjust in mother’s care for Sam. He gestured to the table with a large bag and she glanced toward the table. 

 

“I got clothes for you. Put them on, I'll watch Sammy for you.”

 

Dean didn't argue and hands Sam to John. She was careful to ensure Sam wouldn’t fall out of their hands. She took the bag of clothes and went to change in the bathroom. She noticed there wasn’t any pants to put on and found it weird. Then this weird garment to put on and recalled when Mary wore one. She tried to figure out how to put it on and finally did it. After that, it was like she’s a doll dressed up and she came out. John looked pleased to see the outfit suits the figure. 

 

“Good, you look decent for a woman. We will be leaving town and I’m meeting someone else to discuss the investigation. Grab everything and let’s go.”

 

She understood and went to gathered everything in one bag. John handed the baby over to her and she handled it all. They headed into the car, Dean gets Sam settled into the baby car seat and buckled him up well. She sat next to him and waited for John to drive off. The man closed to trunk and went in the driver’s seat. They hit off the road and John glanced in the rear view mirror on them. 

 

“Has Sammy been doing well since I was gone for three days?”

Dean nodded, “Yes, he’s happy and content. I had no trouble with him and he trusts me well.” She didn’t know what to say and figured to go along.

“Good. He deserves growing up with a mother and you will do perfectly for him. You know him better than anyone else. Anyone ask, you are his biological mother. I’m just the uncle in public, but dad in private.”

“I understand.”

“Good and I'll do shopping for food before I follow the investigation. You need anything?”

 

Dean looked over to Sam and seeing his eyes looking up at her. He grabbed her finger and waving it around. 

 

“A crib for Sammy... Having him on the bed isn't safe. Maybe when he's a little older he can sleep on the bed.” Dean didn't really know what to ask. 

John nodded, “I'll get the good ones.”

 

The ride turned silent for the rest of the day. Dean kept her attention on Sam nonstop and always loved him. She didn't understand why she needed to be a woman, but he could tell that John did it for a reason. Yet, the feeling within her was weighing in as if she isn't considered in the decision. She lost a mom too and deserved to grow up by a mother. It wasn't fair to her as she didn't ask for this. But suddenly it's demanded of her to do a mother job. 

 

John kept his words when they arrive to a motel. He got food, a crib, and a high chair. He did not stay around much and went off to do the investigation. Dean was left alone with the baby and having to care for Sam. Dean felt trapped within the room and nothing to do. She bundled up Sam and packed the diaper bag. Then, went somewhere for a change while carrying Sam in her arms. 

 

She found a library and headed in. She went to adult floor section and looked to see if there's a book about taking care of a baby. It took awhile, but Sam was sleeping on her chest and curled up comfortable. Dean found the books and took a couple off the shelves. She went to a sitting area down and read while Sam napped. 

 

The information caught her attention and didn't know all the basic things. Another book talks about pregnancy as he recalled Mary pregnancy with Sam. She didn't know the things mothers had to do for months. She needed to know how to know to make a baby. She returned the two books and went to look for making babies. She found one and went to read it... There were visual idea and how sex got involved between two opposite genders. She now understood why John needed a mother... So Sam could know where babies come from. 

 

Sam woke up and grew little fussy as he couldn’t hold off his crying. Dean began to feed him with a bottle and he calmed down. She watched him feed and knowing they're going to be okay. As long she has little Sammy, it was going to be okay. 

  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

John found a place to stay temporarily for them and got whatever Dean needed to take care of Sam. Between them have rarely spoke much about anything else, but today... John is home it's been a month since Mary died. 

 

Dean is cooking for dinner and doing house work to keep up. She has Sam down for a nap on a routine and made sure he's adjusting well. 

 

John didn't have anything planned to go anywhere. He's had been working on the case with the officers, but it was getting nowhere. He hasn't warped his mind about how Dean actually transformed by the witch. He wasn't really thinking straight that day, but it was enough to do for him. He can see a little Mary in Dean, but ached his heart to know she's gone. 

 

“... Settling in okay? I figured we're here for a few months and Sam probably doesn't notice.”

Dean kept cooking, “Sam is on a routine to stick with, it helps him to feel well adjusted.”

“I meant you, Dean. Are you settled in okay? The bed comfortable? Shower is good?”

She sighed, “I'm not complaining.”

“Oh, okay... You... Can complain like not enough milk or something. I'm not helping around the house or something.” John awkward explained. 

 

Dean nodded and didn't think much about it. She's too focus on caring for Sam. It's the tension of having John being actually home for short time. They haven’t spent much time with each other as friends or father to daughter relationship. It would be a simple car ride to go elsewhere and nothing else. The absence between them was enough to get by and Dean was used to that. She didn’t expect a day he would be around and not to be on the job for a change. John would disappear for days and Dean would just do things in a normal routine. Eventually became a normal thing for them to go.

 

Sam was growing bigger and becoming more active. Dean bought a book to help know what to expect for baby's growth development. She couldn't wait until Sam could start crawling and walking. It's a joyous feeling as a mother for Dean and nothing could change that. She would get him into different things according to the book. She wanted him to grow up healthy and well-rounded child. She knew it wasn’t perfect and each child responded differently. 

 

……………….

 

Traveling and moving into temporary home became a norms for the Winchesters. Dean noticed John has become a different person lately. He's becoming moodier when coming home, skulking alone, and gets upset at the littlest thing. She didn’t know why he would act so unusual, but she kept her attention onto the child growing up. John would disappeared for days and other times, he would come in late at night. 

 

Sam is nearly a year old and he's starting to walk little by little. She watched him doing everything he can to walk on his own. Suddenly the door slammed open and the man rushed in hurriedly. Her body jerked around to see John all horrified in his face. Yet, emotionless about the fear behind him.

 

“We need to leave.” He insisted.

Dean scooped Sam up into her arms with her brows coming together, “What? What's going on?”

“We're leaving! Now,” he snapped at her.

 

She became protective over Sam when being yelled at. She quickly gathered everything and placed them into the trunk. She seated Sam into the car seat properly and John was driving off. 

 

“What's going on?”

“Shut up!” He made a snipped turning on the road. 

 

Dean trembled uncontrollably and didn't understand what was happening. John was driving faster and faster than usual. Suddenly the car jolted and bang. She clung onto Sam's car seat and looked out to see horrifying creature. It looked like half wolf and half human in one. She couldn't gather herself to scream and it was trying to get in. John yanked the car around and threw off the creature. Dean blinked and shook her head. 

 

“What is THAT?” Dean insisted to know. 

“Oh... You know, werewolf.”

 

She couldn't breathe as she didn't think they'd exist. She stammered and trying to process it. 

 

“Why is it after us? What did you do?”

John took the highway exit, “Wrong place, bad timing. Apparently there's monsters that exists. I found out a few months ago.”

“Well clearly you upset one, why?” She scoffed.

“... I killed its mate.”

“You what?” She blinked, “Why!”

“Because I'm a hunter now! My wife was murdered by a demon and I'm trying to figure out how to kill the demon.”

 

They never talked about Mary, investigation briefly... But never about her. Dean shook her head in horror. 

 

“Keep the hunter stuff away from Sam. I will not have this happen again!” Dean demanded bitterly.

 

John understood and Dean focused onto Sam to stay calm. He's not aware what's really going on. John looked around and noticed no werewolves after them. He slowed down driving and trying to figure out where to next. 

 

John found a small motel and rented a room with two bedrooms. Dean gets Sam into his nap and the crib set up. She waited for him to sleep and he finally did. She joined the common area and saw John with the journal. It didn't look used as much, but he's writing it in. 

 

“You have questions?” John didn't look up. 

She scoffed, “What were you thinking? Bringing That…. That monster home!”

John looked up at her harshly, “I wasn't aware there's a mate. I'm still figuring out hunting and being a hunter.”

“Why? Why the hell you want to deal with monsters?” She stomped, “It could have gotten you killed or us!”

 

John knew he was in trouble, but shook his head. 

 

“... I realized a couple months ago, someone explained to me and a demon murdered her. I'm going to kill that demon.”

“How in the world are you going to do that?”

“By becoming a hunter and make sure I have enough practice.”

“And what Sam and me? What if they come after us? You want us dead too?”

“No!”

“Then stop hunting!”

“I can't,” John quickly stood up and glared at her, “... I'll... Teach you how to protect yourself and Sam.”

 

Dean wasn't thrilled about John continuing Hunter's life and knowing actual monsters existing. But expected to fight back as well. She shook her head. 

 

“I'm going to get food, Sam is napping and don't bother him. I'll be back in time to feed him.” She goes out the house. 

 

John couldn't stop her and sat back down on the couch. Dean walked to a store and trying to understand why dad would do such thing. He knew their mother was killed and didn't realize that meant murdered. Not by a fire. Her thoughts ran crazy to weigh in the truth of their world. 

 

She knew Sam cannot know any of this and deserves a normal childhood... As normal as possible to offer. His birthday is around the corner and John hasn't said a word. She got a few things for tomorrow as she wasn’t going to forget Sam’s first birthday. She found a candle of number One and placed it in the cart. She strolled around and kept looking around. She looked a certain types of cake and frosting. A whistling caught her attention and she glanced sideway to see who did it. 

 

A young man looking at her as if he’s easily amused and she shook her. She went back to looking at different cake options. She didn’t know what to pick...she never baked before. But, she was figuring out how to make food, so it wouldn’t be too different. 

 

“Hey there sexy, want me to take you to the back and give you a good time?” He hummed gently. 

Dean looked at him with confusion, “Me?”

The young man nodded, “Yeah, I got protection if you’re worried.”

 

Dean hadn’t really considered about sex before, but something told her there wasn’t something to worry about. 

 

“Let me finish my shopping first…” She insisted. 

 

The young man took it as a yes and waited for her to finish up. She finished up and got all her things paid for. The young man took her to the back and made her set down the bags. She didn’t know what to do, but figured it would help. The man lifted her dress up dropped her underwear. He zipped his pants down and placed on the protection as promised. Dean watched him doing everything and he rubbed his member against her clits. She didn’t know what to think of it and feeling the slight spreadness of her clit. His member nudging through as rubbing in. A gasped escaped her lips when the stretching happened and his lips crashed onto hers. He slipped right into her clits and vagina deeply. Her green eyes popped out and trying to understand everything. 

 

The young man thrusts into her nonstop and making her moan. She clung onto him to not fall out of place. He was picking up the pace faster than usual and she gasped. The sensation was overwhelming that she didn’t know if she liked it or not. He pulled out his member and she squirted out. His fingers slipped into her clits into the vagina as he thrusts rapidly. Dean didn’t know anything was possible to feel things differently. The man kept kissing her and devouring her as if she is food. Her knees giving out so slowly and feeling the unusual sensation. The tension growing stronger than usual and the urge to come. The urges stealing her breath away and suddenly whisked away.

 

He knelt down and licked her down. His hand moved away slowly and trying to feel every part of her clits. She shivered at each movement taking place and couldn’t help it, but cum. She came heavily and completely wet. He stood up and removed the protection on his member and forced her on her knees. He held up his member to her face and made her open up. He slipped into her mouth and she was surprised by all of this. He thrust into her and she was trying to keep up breathing. She figured out what to do and felt something warm slid into her mouth. 

 

“Swallow it, pretty one,” He kept cumming down into her mouth. 

 

Dean did what he asked and swallowed it all down. He slowly pulled out his member and thrusted back in deeply. He held her head and she was trying to move away. She groans and squealed as he came into her throat, forcing the swallow immediately, and let her go after the last swallow. She collapsed onto her legs from exhaustion and he admired what he did. 

 

“That’s perfect. You’re perfect, slut.”

 

Dean didn’t know what to say, but she nodded along. He came up to her and held her head. He shoved his member back into her mouth and did what he wanted. He pulled himself out. Dean allowed him and found herself into a new position all on her hands and knees. He flipped the dress over her and held her waists. He rubbed his member between her bottoms up and down as he was cumming. A cold spat and his hand rubbed it all over. She tensed up and didn’t know what to do in this situation. 

 

He moved in closely and forced his hard member into her anal. The stretching was too much and felt like tearing apart the skin. The spatting kept going and rubbed all around her. He finally moved into her deeply as he scissored in. He thrusted into her and kept going nonstop. Dean struggled to withhold the screaming,but there was an odd sensation to feel that her body waved through the craving. He held her waists and thrusted in deeply each time. He came and filled her up without guilt. Suddenly the thrusts feel slower each time and he groaned loudly. The cums filled her anal up as there was no room. He stayed inside of her for a little while and wiggled it. 

 

“You like that, slut? You want more?”

 

Dean was breathless and didn’t get the chance to say no. He took it as a yes and returned to thrust her with his member. It went on for another thirty minutes and he finally stopped. He pulled up his pants and zipped up. 

 

“Thanks for the fuck, slut.”

 

He walked away and Dean watched him leave. She didn’t realized this what was sex was actually like. It was...a gain perspective. She grabbed her underwear and fixed herself up. She hurried back home while feeling oddly strange with all the changes taking place. She looked at the clock and sees that there’s still time to do what she needed to do. She put the food away and took a quick shower. She felt a little better, but it didn’t change anything that happened. She changed dress and felt comfortable to wear. She headed to the kitchen and cooked dinner. John was in another room. 

 

She was recalling everything was happening as she’s cooking and trying to make sense of things. It was nothing what the books have explained, but she didn’t know what else to do. She decided to focus on caring for Sam and that was important thing.     

 


	3. Chapter 3

John kept his words to show Dean how to protect themselves. Dean hated it, but she did for Sam. More often, they would be going different town to town as John found a new case and Dean would hear all about it. She was getting tired of seeing him living the hunter’s life and knowing what he was doing. The risks involved and watched that journal becoming filled up more over time. John would tell her about certain monsters he faced and what he learned from the experiences. Dean warned him not to mention supernatural related around Sam. He wanted that life completely separated. It went on for about nearly two years.

 

One day, John went off to the next town over and Dean was dealing with issues in the motel rooms. She hated this lifestyle, but understood it was necessary. There’s a knock on the door and she went to answer it. Sam was napping at this hour, but it was short. She headed to the door and opened it up. A man stood in front of her door with a smile to greet immediately.  

 

“Hello ma’am, I’m wondering if you could help me out.”

Dean stammered, “Um...what is it?” Something made her felt the urge to scram. 

He entered into the house with red eyes appearing, “You in bed.” 

 

She froze for a second to realize that’s a demon and she ran straight to the kitchen. Her hands knocked everything down in behind her. The items crashed onto the ground to make difficult obstacle to go after her. The demon went after her and appeared in front of her. She shook her head and backed away, but realized no way to run without tripping over things. Her hands tried to find something to keep running off. 

 

“Please...don’t...please!” 

“Oh, don’t worry, you’ll love every minute of it.” The smirk across his face.  

 

Dean needed to figure out what to do and tried to run the opposite way. Only grabbed by the arms before she could turn around. He held her closely to his body and sniffed her hair. She tensed for a moment.

 

“Oh, sweetness…” He yanked her along to the bedroom, which would be John’s room. 

 

Dean tried to yank away, only to be gripped tighter than usual, and gasped from squeezing. He thrashed her onto the bed and she tried to move away quickly as possible. Suddenly yanked back to where he wanted her. He vanished her clothes and her skin shivered uncontrollably. She tried keep her legs together and found them split by forced. She tried to move away and still forced back where she was. His grips were tighter than usual as it kept her in place. 

 

The red eyes stared directly at her and stared for a while. Her body trembled uncontrollably and shook her head at him. He was no longer wearing clothes and he was watching her tremble under him. All her thoughts begged for the escape and nothing came in to mind. What could she do against a demon.

 

The demon slipped into her without a warning or preparation. A few seconds, the shooting pain caused her to nearly scream and jerked her head side way to keep herself together. He went in deeply and feeling him inside her. It was becoming too much by the second as he went in longer and deeper. She didn’t understand how that was possible. The tears fell down on her faced and unable to move at all. None of her strength could help her to get out of the mess she’s in. 

 

The red eyes demon spent his time onto her and did not say a single word. The time dragged on like it was nothing and became like eternity. Something was not right as it shook her core. As if all the happiness drained away from her and couldn’t fight back for those happiness. Everything tearing her as if she was about to split in half and she couldn't scream. Time felt frozen or not changing a thing, yet, drags on for so long. 

 

The demon leaned down into her body and pounded into her harshly. She grunted as hit her organs and feeling the hot breathe on her face. She tightly squeezed her eyes and feeling the warm body over her. He kept pounding into her harder each time and slowed down. She gasped and clung the sheets. 

 

The harsh pounding suddenly the shooting warmth in her. Everything stopped and she couldn't move. The sensation of that extra heat weighed in and sunk in the mind. The weight of that thought became heavier and broke the shock within her. 

 

The demon moaned and remained inside of her for a while. He barely move and stayed inside of her. His nose inched her neck and breathed in deeply. 

 

Her urges to run from him in desperation and hoping to be all over. A nightmare that could end it all. The tears fell down her hot cheeks. To lose control for everything she did not see coming. 

 

“That's... Perfect. Ready for another round?”

 

The tears streamed down her hot face to realize there was no escape. The demon kept her in place and won. He stood up while inside of her and pulled his member out. He admired what he was looking down. He rubbed his member down her clits. 

 

He held his member up and -

 

“Mommy! Mommy!” A shrieking cry from another room. 

 

Suddenly the warm body is no longer there and Dean opened her eyes. She realized the demon vanished and that Sam was crying for her. The motherly instinct jumped into action. She grabbed a heavy robe and tossed it on. She tied it up and rushed over to Sam. 

 

Sam is crying as he's sitting up and rubbing his eyes. Dean rushed over to him and sat next to him to hold him. 

 

“I'm here, Sammy, mommy's here. What's wrong?” 

Sam wept, “I got a scary dream and everything in a fire! I got hurt and no one loves me. You said you hate me! No love me no more!” Hiccoughing in his tears. 

Dean shook her head and pulled him into a hug, “It's all a dream, Sammy, it's a bad dream. I could never hate you. You're my little boy! I love you too much.” She kisses his forehead, “nothing would ever change that.”

He sniffled, “You promise mommy?”

She smiled, “I promise you all my heart.” Kissed his head.

 

Sam curled up into her arms and Dean held him closely. She was glad for his nightmare to save her, but that demon didn't look like he was finished. She would need to figure out how to stop the demon next time or she might not make it alive next time. 

 

………………. 

 

Dean took care of Sam and finally took him to bed. She gave him a little teddy bear to sleep with. She took a long shower and trying to forget what happened this afternoon. The eyes changing to red burned in her mind and the feels all around her. It shivered her body at the horrible experience. The tears streaming down her face as she hated every moment of it. She didn't know what to do. 

 

It has been couple months since it happened. She has everything arranged to prevent the demon after her, but it didn't feel enough. John was barely around. He would be gone for days and be back to go on a long trip to another area. Dean spent her free time trying to know everything to fight off a demon. She learned to use the latin language in her free time to study whenever she had the chance.  

 

John didn't have anything to do one day and Dean told him that Sam must nap at noon for an hour and can play with his toys after. She would be back with dinner. She needed a little escape for a change.  

 

She went out and found a library. She picked up a few books on learning things about how to fight back. None of them seem to help. There wasn’t a lot of information from her experience as a demon has the ability to use their powers. Nothing had seemed to be measured up to what she needed the most and tried to read everything she could find.  

 

“Miss?” A young man asking. 

 

Dean flinched as she sat up and stared at the man. He nearly looked like John, but different. She didn't understand why he was approaching her. He stepped back and provided his hands in surrender. 

 

“I'm sorry, miss... It's just... You looked like my grandmother. What year is this?”

She flustered and looked down, “It's 1986. Why…. Why are you asking the year?”

 

The man was shock and blinked at her. Dean noticed his clothes wasn't today's fashion and the similarity to her father. To be recognized as someone's grandmother? 

 

“... Time traveled?” She whispered curiously. 

He nodded slowly, “... Are you my future daughter or…?”

Dean sighed, “... No, I'm John's daughter. Complicated, but not getting into that. What are you doing here?”

He sat across from her table, “I created a portal to access my son... John. But, it's clear the portal felt I should be with my future generation. I need to give you the key to the place for safety. It'll destroy the monster following me.” He presented to her the key. 

 

She looked at the key curiously and it wasn't an average size. It was bigger, but she took it anyway. 

 

“But what's the key leads to?”

“The bunker for Men of Letters, women of Letters if this time accepts women yet.”

She sighed, “What's that about?”

“We deal things in supernatural in secrecy... Something tells me I never told John.”

 

Dean shook her head, but she knew the truth to the world. She looked at the key. 

 

“Where is this bunker? Why is it important?” 

“You're clever thinking. It's design to protect the place, but has all the resources of supernatural world. Only men of letters and women of Letters can go in, which you are. The world is dangerous place, but there are ways to fight back. We're more book studies than hunters are, better to think and learn before fighting. It is in Kansas, but the key will guide you.” He pointed to the numbers on it, “coordination. I must go.”

 

Dean saw him get up and leaves. He vanished away and she almost wanted to cry. She felt she would be safer this way. She puts the book away and went on a quick shopping. She was going to find the bunker one way or another. Something making her heart raced that could not be contained. She needed to learn first and ready herself the next step. 

 

She couldn’t believe the key in her hand could change everything and wondered how much safer she would be from the demon. 

 


	4. Chapter 4

Dean spent a couple weeks learning the map in Kansas specifically. She was using the key figure things out. Sometimes she would be up late before sleeping and found herself on the table asleep. She didn't know why she's sleepier than usual.

 

One day, she has Sam watching educational program and she's cooking lunch. The commercial came on and she was listening in case Sam goes off running in the motel. 

 

Something caught her attention and she faced the TV. There's women who look rounded on their stomach and they're talking about their pregnancy. Something clicked in her mind. She rushed into the bathroom and found something. She went to the bathroom and waited for the results. She left the tests alone as she still needed to watch Sam. 

 

Sam is busy building his blocks and watching TV. Dean went back to the bathroom and saw the results. She swallowed down hard and realized why the demon did this.

 

She began to pack things up and kept cleaning up. She did this in between cooking. Her mind ran around crazy to weigh in the consideration. The timing was fitting in. 

 

“Mommy? What are you doing? Is Daddy saying we going somewhere?” Sam looked up at her. 

She look at Sam, “We're going to live somewhere privately. Daddy is going to work a lot and he'll need a home to come to.” 

 

Sam nods and went back to playing. Dean realized John would need to know, but what to tell him? She knew he would be back for dinner. 

 

She did everything to get ready and kept her focus. The door opened to reveal John. Sam got up and ran up.

 

“Daddy!” 

John chuckled and picked him up, “Hey there, Sammy. You been good to Mommy?”

“Yeah! Mommy got me blocked and I build houses!”

“Oh good! I'll let you get back to building.” He set Sam down.

 

Sam went to play with his toys. John headed over to the kitchen and writes into his journal. Dean finished cooking and brings the food to the table. 

 

“John...I... Need to talk to you.”

“Give me couple minutes.”

“Now.” She insisted. 

 

John never expected Dean to say something serious. She sat across from him and looked at him. John puts his journal away and gave her the attention.

 

“...I... Found a place for Sam and me. It'll protect him and me. If you wish to do your job, you can go without us holding you back. You can call me when you want to come to the place.”

John blinked, “Oh... And why all of a sudden now?”

Dean breathed in deeply, “I'm pregnant. Two months at least. I can't be constantly traveling and Sam needs a stable home. This place I've looked into is good and safe for him and me. And the next child.”

 

John wasn't prepared for any of that. He didn't know Dean knew what pregnancy was, but he had to give him credit. He gulped down and look at Sam. Then he turned to her.

 

“I...I can take a break if you want?”

Dean hummed, “Continue the job, you can come when I'm getting towards the end of pregnancy. I'll probably need help as birthing part is not my expertise area. I might need a hospital. I'll figure it out.” 

John hummed, “and the father of the baby is…?”

Dean shook her head, “Not to be trusted.” 

“Dean, are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes. I'm sure. I found a school nearby and Sam can start in September for preschool. It'll get him ready for kindergarten. He needs to have stability of a home and not motel to motel. That's not fair to him.”

“You need a ride to the place you're living in?”

She smiled, “If you could, please?”

John nodded, “I will, but I'm coming over during holidays.”

“Good, Sam would be disappointed if you didn't.”

 

John softly chuckled, but he didn't know if this was the best idea or not. However, Dean has proven to be excellent mother in the role and that Sam deserved stability lifestyle. Having to move constantly wouldn't be fair to him growing up. 

 

Dean gets Sam in the chair for dinner and they all ate together. Sam is being a silly kid himself and enjoying family time. John figured this was actually the best idea to do to keep them safe. 

 

After dinner was done, the place cleared up and they hit off the road. Dean gave John directions to the place. They weren't far and finally arrived. Dean went to look for entrance and sensed the key guiding him. John carried Sam and their luggages. Dean opened the door and they went in. The place looked like hills, but inside as like military base bunker, only for recognized members. 

 

John was shock with the place and stammered a bit. He didn't know how she found this place. Dean saw a note and picked it up. 

 

_ Dear Miss, _

 

_ I apologized not asking your name. However, this place is yours. Many members didn't survive and the rest left. You do as you wish in this place and let it become your home. I hope this brings you security and a home. I hope this helps you out in everything you will need.  _

 

_ Welcome home. _

 

_ Your grandfather. _

 

Dean smiled and puts the notes away. John joined her side in shock. She's happy to feel safe already. Sam is fascinated with the place. 

 

“... How?”

Dean look at John, “... Someone owed me a favor after I helped them. Said I can have this place.” She scooped Sam out of his arms, “It's our home now.”

“... Good job. No way anyone can find this place easily.”

 

Dean nods and went to look for bedrooms, which there are multiple ones and every one of them has a bed. She set Sam into bed and decided a kitchen nearby his room will do. She returns to John and sees he's fascinated. 

 

“John, go back to hunting. Marvel at this place when you're visiting. I still need to figure this place out too.” 

John sighed, “Call me if you need anything…” He headed out.

She smiled lightly, “I will... Right now, I want to figure things out myself.” She breathed in deeply. 

 

John stood for a moment, but understood that Dean planned this for a reason. He trusted her as she's raising Sam. Now, it'll be two children for her. John turned and headed up the stairs to leave. Dean watched him leave and knowing he would visit. 

 

Her hands settled in her stomach and knowing nothing will be the same. She went to look at the books and sees it has supernatural information. She explored the place to see what else and found random things. She found a library area and went in. She reads the title and stopped when it says demon. She picked it up and took it with her. She chose a room next to Sam's and sat down on the bed. 

 

She opened the book and began to read. 

 


End file.
